aftermath

While I am definitely a fan of the band and its music I would stop well short of the fanatic label and would probably only consider myself at best a good aquaintence with the various members even after so much history. Since the eighties I have only spoken to three members of the band extremely rarely and have seen them even less. Until this summer (2008) I hadn't seen any of them since the reunion show at Opolis and before that the Bluefish debacle and before that many, many years.

It was mere coincidence that I was in OKC at the time of the Norman Street Festival and had only a little time to run down early in the day. I had read that the Wickers were going to play the Sooner Theatre and wanted to attend and hoped to see Meade and Walker in the area. And that is how it happened - sort of. Meade in fact was one of the first persons I saw and as always was his friendly mirthful self. He was rushed since he had to soundcheck with the Kittens so not much more than hello-goodbye. Even though he was probably jet-lagged (coming in from China!) and pushed for time he still took time to say hello.

I then made my way to see the Wickers and because I had visited with an old friend I hadn't seen in eons I was late and only got in on the last 3 - 4 songs. They looked and sounded great. I felt as if I were watching a TV special they were so well rehearsed and polished. Best of all Chris Royse seemed to be his old self again, joking, smiling and bantering with the audience and band members alike. It was a great show and after it ended I went around back to say hello. I remember also I had hoped to be able to buy a cd if they had any.

As I turned the corner there was the band moving their equipment and speaking with friends and family. I waited until Chris was free and passing by I said hey - hello! His smile evaporated and he grunted - oh hi. I said hey great show and ... he cut me short and said he had to change and abruptly walked away. I was a little stunned. I had never had any bad blood with him - maybe he was just in a hurry. I decided to offer help in moving amps and packing up when he returned but as he emerged from the building he gave me a dismissive look, turned his back and walked away. It was like a hard slap across the face and I felt so awkward and ashamed I just quietly shrank away.

I do not know why he of all people did that and why me. I hadn't seen him in years, had come out of my way to congratulate him etc and here he was acting like I owed him money or something. Anyone else I could shrug off fairly easily but this was like the Dali Lama spitting at you. It remains a mystery to me and I think I'll let it (and him) go at that.

Walker to me was the most accessable of the group but that doesn't mean he didn't have quirks too. In the fall of 1988 when I was in the drama department at OU I was lucky enough to score a part in a play. It was a demanding role that required a lot of rehearsal. At about this same time Todd offered me the bass slot in his band. I was eager to join up but explained it might be a bit of a stretch what with the play and all. We decided to make a go of it and over all I'd say it worked pretty well. Balancing time between the band and the play was taking its toll on me but I made it to the end of the play's run (2 1/2 months) and was ready to devote full time to the group. Unfortunately I got very ill from the strain and Todd had a show at what once was the Satellite Twin Theater. Anyway I was ill and feverish and suffering chills throughout the set but got through it. But all he could do was berate me for wearing a coat while performing. Nobody wears a coat on-stage! I think it was also at this show that Todd did his last stage dive and wrentched his back out. I was replaced after that show.

Over the years I have had occasional contacts with him. While living in San Diego I went to a funky record store that claimed to have every album ever in print. Ha - I'll show them - got the Defenestration EP? Why yes we do. Oh man - I called Todd and told him. He asked if I could buy it and mail it to him. He had in fact never gotten his own copy of his own EP he said. One last dirty trick played on him. I said okay if he would make a copy of all the Defenestration songs not on record for me. He had already made a few of these for other lucky fans. Deal. I sent the EP but never received the tape (nor even the cost of the EP and the mailing). I reminded him of it periodically and it was always in the works but it never arrived.

Years later I returned to the area and low and behold wound up working virtually across the street from Todd in OKC. I emailed a hello and we exchanged a few emails enough for him to invite me to the final show (for which I am grateful). But that eventually petered out and even though Walker asked for and I sent to him several photos of himself and the band I still never got the promised tape.

Meade himself a very kind and giving fellow also is a bit quirky (big surprise - a rock star quirky?!) After the EP release and after Doug Powell's abrupt ousting Meade had variously promised me the bass slot. (Evidence for this can be seen in Meade's own handwriting on the inner sleeve of the EP.) In fact directly after the Subterranea show he offered it to me and I not only accepted but told him I had $5,000 saved that I could put into the band for equipment and upkeep on the van. When I told Walker that years later he said he'd have strangled Meade if he'd known. But then the band broke up completely. When I found out I (and quite a few others) encouraged Meade to reform the band which they did. But now I'd have to try out. (?!) When I asked later why Kollman got the coveted slot it turned out that the decision didn't hinge on who was the most talented but that Kollman had had a really great bag of pot with him and that is what tipped the scales in his favor. On such small minutia history turns.

I won't even go into the story of me getting them radio airtime and a tour lined up in Australia - of the entire continent - bills payed - courtesy of the leading radio station in the country 2JJJ (2 Triple-J) if only Meade would ask Walker back in. Walker said he'd do it only if Chris Royse was on bass. I don't know what Chris' response was but I do know what Meade's was. All he had to do was one tour and return to the USA in triumph. He could then do solo stuff on the side with a built-in platform to showcase it or he could even then break up the band - whatever - and here it was handed to him on a silver platter gratis all that he and the others had been striving for for 8 years. (I think by this time I'd sunk to my knees.) The answer was as sure and swift as it was final. No.

Although together the various elements that have made up Defenestration into a group do deserve respect and some adulation as a group (especially after all the hard work and heartbreaks that went into its formation, maintaining and ultimate demise) - it is clear that when not on stage and performing that the individual members are all too human with all the attendant frailties and flaws that plague the rest of us mere mortals.

I never had any intention of doing this site except that it was part of a course I was taking in night school some time ago and I conveniently had a few photos and a unique perspective of the Defenestration trainwreck. Though I seemingly have quite a bit of knowledge about the group I am sure there are others who know more and just haven't the time to be bothered with putting up a website. In fact I know of no other website in all the internet devoted exclusively to this band, sad to say, and I find it a touch ironic that it fell to me to create this site for them. And although it might be noted that when they get together as a band I truly do get involved in the event, it is only as a band that they overwhelm. The date whom I had taken with me to the Bluefish debacle noted that when I was speaking to Meade, Walker and Royse together I acted as though I were speaking with the Beatles or something. I said to her that to me (when together) these guys are the Beatles.

When thinking back on it all it would seem that the ultimate irony lies in the way that I first heard of the band and was so introduced to the Norman music scene. It was in fact the last date I had with a girl with whom I had had a rather stormy relationship. She had argued that there really were local bands that could produce great original music and to prove it twisted my arm to go and see Defenestration perform in the OU Museum of Art's lightwell. One last argument that she won hands down on the way out the door of our relationship.

And now all these years later the only one of all of this cast of characters who still speaks to me and is still happy to see me and include me in their life is this self-same girl. The one with whom I tooks turns with screaming at each other until our throats were raw and then flipping over to the other extreme and not speaking to each other for the next two years though we often ran into each other at the shows and on Campus Corner. The only one I can think of who really has a right to never speak to me again, to be as rude as she desires, to hate me to the end of her days - and doesn't. Contrast that against any of these who can't even be bothered to say hello in passing or return a phone call.

In closing I would like to thank the members for their time and input and support into helping put this site together - but I can't. As far as I know none of them have even seen this site though years ago I gave Walker and Royse the website address and had asked for comments or suggestions. Once again not with a bang nor a whimper - just a shrug.

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